There is no magic pill, do or do not

There is no magic pill to make the changes you want in your life or is it?

In this article we explore why people don’t succeed when following a magical recipe to achieve their goals and how we can change that.

We can’t change anything if we believe that coaching programs, diets or any kind of training are like a magic pill that will transform who we are without being accountable and persistant.

Expectations vs Reality

For any kind of transformation that you are purposely working for, you will require time. How much? It will depend on your level of commitment, your own capacity to adapt and change, many external factors that act in a direct way in your life and your own mental attitude.

We should always look into expectations with skepticism and avoid magical thinking. It is better to be as realistic as possible to have an idea of how challenging it will be so we can bring up all the energy required to go through. Because our brain is lazy and doesn’t like to make big efforts or spend too much energy, we need to trick him.

Once we have corrected any sort of magical thinking and approach the tasks to complete our goals, we need to keep us vigilant from day dreaming into magical thinking again, specially those moments where we feel lazy or unable to commit. The best way to do this is to take a slight step backward and see how much you have improved so far and look into the whole process with the same skepticism, seeing all the good and the bad too. Where are we feeling successful and well driven and where we need to make corrections.

To do or not to do?

Now the best course of action is to set ourselves into motion. Doing is always better than not doing, unless not doing is the doing.

How can we see the difference? One person told me once that if I was doubtful about something it was better not do and wait. But then are you going to keep waiting all your life to be certain about something in order to start doing? It can be tricky because under certain circumstances, is better to do and some others is better not to.

The big question is: How much am I ready to risk? Are you ready to risk your professional position, your financial situation, your relationship status, your physique, your on going lifestyle, your thoughts and the stories you tell to yourself at night before sleep, your values, your honor? Where is your limit, and how much are you willing to risk in order to achieve your goals? In other words, how much value do you give to that objetive, dream or vision in comparisson to your present life?

The 80/20 rule of life

Sometimes we are going to be 100% sure about something, but even with that level of determiantion, we will never know exactly what are going to be our results, unless we put ourselves into action, so I say there is never 100% certainty about nothing…

Thats why I like the idea of the 80/20 rule. If I am 80% certain and determinated about something then is worth to take the risks and set into action. Life is constantly moving and so are we, so we can’t expect the same level of anything all the time forever. But if the 80% persists within a certain range (70% to 100%), then its a go. If it goes below my underlimit and I am certain this is what I wanted but many things have made my energy, focus, etc to become so low, then I should to take a small pause. A «not doing» kind of doing and see what happens. Taking distance gives us perspective and let us renew our energy and convictions.

We do the same thing with strength, flexibility and almost any kind of training. We have very high volume weeks and then we have low level weeks where we deload and release the stress produced by the high training so our body can adapt to all the new adaptations it has gone through.

Weight lose diets includes cheat meals from time to time, to do the same kind of effect in our psychology and hormonal levels. We need to decompress and make a safe pause to release the tension produced.

The right program

We have talked so much in other articles in this blog about the importance of mindset and how to keep it up and the fundamental necessity to turn into action our dreams to transform them into achievable goals and long term objectives. Yes but one thing that will surely help us to stay on that 80% level and get the results we want is the right program or guide.

It is true that at the beginning doing anything is better than nothing, but as we advance we need a program that help us specifically to get where we want to be. Thats why there are so many coaches like me out there trying to teach you with their systems how to do something. How to get those results. Again, without an action driven attitude and the right mindset is impossible to persevere and succeed.

What we need is to follow the plan with commitment and staying accountable. When this two things are clear, 80% of the job is done. That is why a coach can be so helpful, because you will get a specific program and an accountability partner to go throughout the process succesfully. In the end you are doing the hard job, nobody is going to take it off from you, but as soon as you start getting results you will understand how much of importance is to have a great coach with you.

Do you want to get serious and real results? Call me and lets start our journey together!

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Cultivating strong and positive beliefs

How can I strengthen positive beliefs? What are the best techniques to transform the way I think? How can I change the way I perceive myself?

Short answer: By having the right habits that will allow you to stay always on a «positive attitude» and that will help you get out fast from any sort of negativity, stress or pessimism.

In this article I will teach you what to do to become a positive thinker and what techniques are the best to transform your beliefs and self perception.

What are positive or negative beliefs?

Beliefs are strong ideas that have rooted deep into our mind and body making us to perceive them as beliefs. They have been taught and strengthened through time by our environment. They define the way we perceive every experience and the way we respond to it. Basically they are the factors that will limit us or let us be who we are.

A belief will usually define something. When it becomes to strong it is transformed into prejudgment. They reflect our values and our emotional states. Every experience that we have will be a reflection of them, because we are set into activities, those activities have repercussions. The reason we choose to do one thing or another is usually established by what we consider correct, reasonable or likeable.

Those things are defined by the beliefs we have on them and what they should produce in our life once we get it. But we are not straightforward or linear, we are contradictory, we have contradictory beliefs and somehow «good and bad» merges as one in our internal chaos.

There are the beliefs you inherit, that you learn and the ones that you wish to have. In another way of saying it; «there is the person you are and the person you want to become». And what enables you to change will be in part the capacity to transform those beliefs that represent the old self into the ones that represent the new self.

Lighter beliefs are easy to change, heavier and older ones is much more challenging. Even some of them may linger with us for the rest of our life. It will be up to you, if you do all what is necessary, if you are really interested in changing and if you have enough skill and mental resilience to go through a transformational experience.

Beliefs are nourished by our behavior

There are 3 doors for any action. The door of the mind which involves our thoughts, the door of the mouth that involves what we «say» and the door of the heart that involves what we actually DO physically speaking with our body.

If you want to change a belief, you need to address the behaviors that are directly related to it. It can be a mental / emotional pattern that is always looping, it can be some words you constantly repeat unconsciously or it can be something you do. Every action has emotional responses which mean they change our hormonal ecosystem, which transforms our entire brain and body.

Detecting physical habits like smoking or eating is way easier than recognizing how we communicate, what sort of emotions our words are charged with and what emotions lies below the surface. Also is even harder to stay focused enough to observe what sort of thought we have during the day and during specific experiences and situations.

Regardless of your level of consciousness making the effort to change one external behavior is much better than staying the same for years.

What are the best techniques to transform our beliefs?

  1. Meditation is the best and at the same time for many people the hardest. Today is so easy to find teachers and guided meditation apps that if you are not trying is because you don’t know it can help you or you just want to stay as you are.
  2. PNL & Coaching are amazing ways to explore and become more conscious, together with therapy they can really be a game changer.
  3. Yoga & Fitness will bring big benefits to our physical body, we will start looking better and feeling better, this will have a great impact in our life.
  4. Travel and living abroad are great ways to expand and see different cultures. By changing our environment e allow ourselves to change our beliefs too. The external world will serve as a mirror to find out more about ourselves.
  5. Music, performance and arts act like catalysts for our creativity and help us let go emotions that may have become stagnated or imprinted in our self identity. When we use any of this methods to express our feelings we also are liberated so we can create a new self.

What is your experience with this techniques? Which one works better for you? Let us know in the comments below!

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Be unstoppable: The power to believe you can

The power to believe

I can. I can. I can. I can do it. I can be. I can have. I can change. I can move. I can fight. I can rest. I can understand. I can learn. I can listen. I can communicate. I can express. I can teach. I can explore. I can forgive. I can remember. I can love. I can feel. I can cry. I can smile. I can enjoy. I can create. I can grow. I can live. I can die.

In this article we will explore the power to believe, how to get a clear idea of our priorities and how empower them to make them come true.

The act of believing is the main act

The most powerful act is to believe in ourselves, in our objectives, in our dreams. When things get difficult, when things get stuck, when feeling paralyzed or overwhelmed, the act of believing will get us out, will set us into action, will change our mood, fill our motivation and courage to do whatever is necessary.

When things are easy and smooth we don’t give so much importance to it, but in desperate times it turns out our beacon of hope. We must light it up with spells and affirmations, with positive thinking and with focus on the present moment.

What can we do now, with what we have in the best way possible?

Turns out that we don’t always meet the ideal requirements to fulfill our goals. Some days ago I read a post from a person stating that the main difference in between successful people and those who aren’t is that the successful people will focus on doing imperfectly rather than waiting for the ideal time.

You want to make videos but you only got your mobile. You want to workout but you can’t afford a gym membership. You want to travel but you don’t have the time or money for it. You want to invite your couple for a romantic date but you lack ideas or don’t feel attractive enough.

There are countless times in which our ideals are far from our reality, nevertheless when doing them anyway you discover a sense of progress and commitment. When you are able to cross through the excuses and put yourself into action anyway, perhaps you don’t get the most desirable results but the ones you get are better than doing nothing.

90% of the people I talk with, will tell me their «situation» and when given a possible solution they will answer like «My problem is…» and even if you continue giving them more solutions their answer will always start in the same way. At some point I ask if they really want to make a change or whats the whole idea of stressing up about something that in reality they don’t want to change!

It is tiring for them, it is tiring for their interlocutor and it is just a waste of time. If you are up to something, just do it and search for results later. When getting dead serious about it, you will find solutions, you will know what to do or what you need to prioritize.

Solution oriented mindset

If you are struggling with many things at the same time or you feel lost and stuck I have a very good exercise that will really help you out. It is a very simple way to detect and clarify everything that is troubling you, all the possible solutions and what to prioritize first.

  1. Make a list of all your problems, troubles and things you need to change or results you want to bring.
  2. Make a parallel list with all possible solutions for each one of them.
  3. Connect those that depends on each other, which solutions would address more than one problem, giving them an order of importance.
  4. Clarify your number 1 priority/solution that would help fix as many problems as possible or that would set up the base to start fixing them.

When you get a clear answer out of it, put yourself in action, sometimes we attract the solution without doing much.

On 2021, I was feeling very lost and was hard to put myself in action. I did this exercise and discovered that the root problem and the main solution that would help me reach out my other goals was only one, I needed to improve my french!

2 weeks later an opportunity came to attend a language school. After several months of stagnation I felt like finally getting out from the dark forest, the path was clear again, the financial situation improved and since then, things got better and better.

To believe you can, you need clarity over your priorities

So rather than having a blind faith over a distant dream I would rather suggest to allow yourself to clarify and define your priorities and use the power of belief to empower them. Imagine you are firing an arrow, you need to visualize it reach its destiny and after you throw it, believe it will come where you aimed at, there is nothing else to do afterwards.

Charge your arrows with positive affirmations to enchant them. To do so write down what you want, state it in present tense, use only positive words. Close your eyes and imagine yourself firing arrows and using powerful words to command them to reach their aim with success.

After all, the rest is just repetition and patience. Have a great day and share this post with friends and family!

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3 tools to wake up the fire of determination

Learn 3 tools to wake up the fire of determination and never let anything to stop you from getting what you want and becoming who you want to be.

Are you lacking the determination required to make any change in your life? Do you consider yourself a determined person when it comes to be 100% committed? What is the reason that some people can have the conviction to follow a path all the way in and many others don’t?

Why you should learn how to fire up and cut the crap quickly?

Life works with cycles and without them, probably it would lose the capacity to keep on going and evolving.

That’s right, the way we progress is by cycles too and we should aim to understand and set up our priorities accordingly. One of the biggest mistakes is to believe things are linear and we just need to go straight forward onto them.

So naturally we feel the desire to get something new and to do so we will need to make some adjustments on our daily habits in order to get it. The problem comes when we are not fully aware of our own cycles, so we expect to «work» with the same intensity all the time, for example. This bring us to deception and repetitive failure, which can make us feel frustration, guilt, anger, etc.

What will mostly happen is that we will need extra energy and time to get fired up again, and if we don’t know exactly how to do it efficiently, then we will quit that endeavour by calling it too difficult, not the right time, not enough «insert skill here», and so on.

Most skillful and successful people know exactly what to do when having their fire down, because they create a ritual or a group of actions to change it.

Understanding our motivation cycles

A wise-man shaman told me once that motivation is not enough to transform your life, that is only the beginning. If motivation is like a big fire in your heart, then determination is the spark that started it.

So let set an example, imagine that tomorrow you are starting a new diet, and by the 3rd day you go out with some friends and eat some slices of your favorite pizza. Most of us will feel guilt and after that will decide to re start the diet next week to fill up again with enough determination (strength). Which predictable we are not gonna start it again in any close date.

So we want to change this and we are not sure of how. Well, first take notes of all your failures and successes and try to understand how your «motivation cycle works». What do you do to feel motivated enough and then what do you do to start, and after what do you do to «fail» or «succeed». Once you get a clear understanding on how do you work internally, then is time to make some changes into that.

We will want to avoid repeating the cycles that brought us to failure, but because we are never really free from them, we should aim to build a protective mindset mechanism that will allow us to fall deep enough to quit(again).

How to start the fire «again»?

Get a goal, make a simple plan and start with what you can and have at the moment.

Sounds easy… but is not.

We will need 3 items to be able to start our fire again and again until we become very skillful and we basically stop noticing any deep changes in our mood and discipline.

Item #1: A ritual to make you spark on anytime and anywhere. It can be some sort of dance, getting out in nature, a conversation with a very like minded and positive friend or coach. Anything that as soon as you do it, makes you feel again the spark to start over and continue. I used to watch some motivational videos in youtube, made a playlist that I would listen everyday after work and would go directly to my training session, no distractions in the middle.

Item #2: The right mindset. Which basically means to understand that life is about cycles, that there are always going to be ups and downs, that perfection is an unattainable ghost, that nothing is so bad or so good, and we can always start again, no matter our age or anything else. The more we cultivate the right mindset, the less danger to quit or dwell into frustration, guilt and other negative emotions and thoughts.

Item #3: An object that remind us who we are, why we started and help us keep our faith in ourselves intact. It can be anything that regardless of the tides of life will always remember us our own value. We need conviction and a recordatory of it. It can be a song, a photo, a certain emotion or experience. Anything that keep us anchored to our inner strength and purpose. I like using a visual recordatory on the wall that I can see everyday.

What now? What else is needed? Am I ready to become a 100% fully determined person that will never let my failures put me down again so I can strive to be the best version of myself?

YES! and not exactly. Why? Because of course this requires practice and repetition, over and over and over. So my sincere wish is that you learn to see failure as your best friend and as new opportunities to master your determination.

There is no specific order in how to apply this tools, just concentrate in repeating them, making changes from time to time. Build up your winning ritual, write down the exact words to cultivate the right mindset and keep your object of anchorage close to you. The rest is just practice and nothing else.

Have a fully determined day starting right now!

If you found this blog article interesting, share it with your friends and family!

Peace.

Félix.

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Yoga Saint-Tropez

Yoga, Fitness and Meditation in Saint-Tropez Book Your Class Today! Private and group classes for people that prioritize their Health and Fitness Life is movement, and from this premise, we learn how to move in ways that our body reaches new limits. Our practice (physical discipline) should bring us health and well-being, altogether, it should…

Practice with me in Saint-Tropez! Yoga Saint-Tropez